The Aftermath of Fear

Friday nights are designated for our family and we try to plan small adventures or mediocre entertainment for our little clan. A few weeks back we spent the evening at St. Peters Village-- a historic 19th century village with a picturesque main street that is adjacent to the boulder-strewn French creek in Chester County, PA. The kids eagerly traversed the huge rocks—jumping over the crevices, looking for a place to land. It’s not entirely a kid-friendly place; in most spots I have a hard time determining just how deep the water is and climbing some of the largest boulders can be tricky. (Although, being in the middle of a pregnancy had some to do with that.) They didn’t fear being swept down the creek or falling down in between boulders. I thought of all these things—especially after Ben, 4 years old, stepped off a rock and completely disappeared underwater. Chris was right there to pull him back out. Even so, I felt like I was keeping up with them instead of encouraging them to keep up with me! We got pizza on the way home and Chris and I gave ourselves an A+ on another fun family night.

Until….we were up with each child throughout the night to comfort them in the midst of bad dreams about being stuck underwater between rocks or losing a sibling in the creek. We didn’t see that coming! I was surprised, then, when days later, they talked about heading back to the St. Peters Village. I had to think of all the times that I have been overcome with fear and made a subconscious decision to avoid that road next time. Sometimes fear is a good warning to do just that. Other times, I think our fears end up making us a little too complacent. Like when I was in Old Navy and I observed a mother calling her 5 year old a “f------ lazy a--.” She berated the child and I was so heartbroken for him. I followed them around the store willing myself to open my mouth but fear kept me from doing it. Fear exposes what I value and what I trust.* My fear of making that mother very angry exposed that I value my ability to avoid “creating a scene” and maintaining physical safety.

There have been moments when I’ve stepped out of my comfort zone only to find failure or rejection. Fear relies on faith…in the wrong thing!* Too often, I’m relying on myself when I should be rooting my faith in God’s faithfulness. Whether I’m grocery shopping, writing a note of encouragement, watching my husband’s football game, sponsoring a child in Guatemala, or trusting that God can do the impossible, I can do it with great courage when I choose to rely on God’s faithfulness and not myself.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
♥, Erin (Read more posts by Erin here)
*Statements taken from Pastor Adam Nagle, Bethany Grace Fellowship.